What an amazing day! I attended a workshop... pardon me, a Joyshop... with Nithya Shanti, a Buddhist teacher, and spent the day being filled with all sorts of wonderful ideas and concepts of how each of us can instantly make our lives better, or at least accept that our lives are good just as they are.
I went to this by myself, which is - first and foremost - quite out of character for me. There were about 20 people who gathered in the very beautiful home of a lady named Sandra, who was extremely generous with her hospitality. We removed our shoes and left them outside the doorway of a very large, empty bedroom and sat on the floor, some on pillows or blankets, others just on the floor. "Please leave shoes and egos outside the room" Nithya told us. Throughout the course of the day, we became friends with the others in the group, we explored some of the things that were causing us pain or unhappiness, we heard stories and anecdotes, we encouraged and praised one another... and I never felt that anyone was being fake or unreal about the things they were saying. It was a very uplifting experience to be accepted by people whom I had never met. And at the same time, it was uplifting for me to not allow myself to judge or hold preconceptions about any of them.
One exercise we did was a greeting. We paired off with people and had to look them in the eyes for at least 5 seconds. Now, if any of you remember from a previous post, I am a shy person (despite what some of my friends will try to convince you). I tend to get intimidated easily when it comes to close personal contact. When I get nervous, I have a hard time looking people in the eye. The idea of this exercise was not very comforting to me. However, Nithya gave us a greeting: "The highest in me bows to the highest in you. May today be the happiest day of your life." And the response: "And so it is." I forced myself to look straight in the eyes of those I spoke with. I said the words with great conviction and I truly believed that I respected that person with such high regard that I was willing to (figuratively) bow to them. I spoke slowly and clearly, and after the response came, I gave them a compliment. I never realized how cool eye color can be! One man had icy blue eyes. A woman had very deep, dark brown eyes. Another had light greenish-hazel eyes. One woman told me my eyes reminded her of the color of a rich coffee. No one has ever told me that before! One woman had a family emergency of some kind that was bothering her, so I wished her and her family the best of luck. Another had a cold, so I wished her well soon. This was such a simple thing to do, and yet it brought all of us remarkably closer in a matter of minutes. It was quite intimate, and very cool.
So, the first lesson: When you're speaking with someone, even if you don't particularly like them, look them in the eye. Speak kindness with conviction and respect. Act in this manner to others, and others will more likely act in this manner to you. Namaste :)
Finding Happiness in Turmoil
One of my dearest friendships is crumbling, approaching dangerously close to irreconcilable at near-breakneck speed. This is terribly devastating to me. But every cloud has a silver lining, right? For every bad there is a good, etc, etc.
The fear of losing this friendship sent me into a tailspin of depression and motivation, almost at the same time. Depression came first and I spent many days and nights crying and feeling sorry for myself. Then, motivation kicked in. I decided that I didn't want to mope around forever and I had things I needed to take care of. So I made some personal changes to my attitude and outlook, and I reached out to others for help (something I'm not always good at doing). I used the wonderful world of Facebook to search for positivity, inspiration, and Moments of AHA. And I found all of them. I found them on pages of positive thinking, and thanks to those pages, I found them in individual people. I have become Facebook friends with a number of people who I never would have had a connection with, if I hadn't been looking for other positive influences.
And thanks to one of those "random" connections, I have found an incredible opportunity to take advantage of. I say "random" (in quotes) because I'm not quite sure that these connections really are random. I believe that I have connected with some of these people at this particular time because they have something to offer me that I need, and perhaps I have something to offer them. I went searching for guidance and help and I found it in people who don't even know me. Of course, that's not to diminish the efforts and effects of my dear beloved friends, because I'd be lying in the fetal position sucking my thumb if it hadn't been for some of them!
Thanks to a newly found friend, I am heading to Troy, NY this weekend to meet and learn from spiritual leader and happiness coach, Nithya Shanti. I am going by myself. This is not something I do very often. I find strength and confidence by surrounding myself with familiar people. I don't like being in most situations alone. But I am really excited to meet my new friend, Lisa, in person and to hear Nithya Shanti and hopefully learn some of his teachings. I "randomly" connected with Lisa on Monday. Makes you wonder, doesn't it....
So, is gaining some new friendships via Facebook worth losing a dear friend of 10+ years? I'm not sure. I miss the solid friendship that we had, but if it hadn't been for the turmoil we're going through, I never would have reached out to others. Everything happens for a reason. I hope that with time, and effort from both of us, my friend and I will be able to find a shred of the relationship we once had, and hopefully even make it better. I also hope that some of the new connections I've made will have a lasting impact on my life, and help me better define what my purpose is on this Earth. While the circumstances with my friend suck, I do not regret being given an opportunity to better myself and learn from other positive people.
There is always a Moment of AHA.
The fear of losing this friendship sent me into a tailspin of depression and motivation, almost at the same time. Depression came first and I spent many days and nights crying and feeling sorry for myself. Then, motivation kicked in. I decided that I didn't want to mope around forever and I had things I needed to take care of. So I made some personal changes to my attitude and outlook, and I reached out to others for help (something I'm not always good at doing). I used the wonderful world of Facebook to search for positivity, inspiration, and Moments of AHA. And I found all of them. I found them on pages of positive thinking, and thanks to those pages, I found them in individual people. I have become Facebook friends with a number of people who I never would have had a connection with, if I hadn't been looking for other positive influences.
And thanks to one of those "random" connections, I have found an incredible opportunity to take advantage of. I say "random" (in quotes) because I'm not quite sure that these connections really are random. I believe that I have connected with some of these people at this particular time because they have something to offer me that I need, and perhaps I have something to offer them. I went searching for guidance and help and I found it in people who don't even know me. Of course, that's not to diminish the efforts and effects of my dear beloved friends, because I'd be lying in the fetal position sucking my thumb if it hadn't been for some of them!
Thanks to a newly found friend, I am heading to Troy, NY this weekend to meet and learn from spiritual leader and happiness coach, Nithya Shanti. I am going by myself. This is not something I do very often. I find strength and confidence by surrounding myself with familiar people. I don't like being in most situations alone. But I am really excited to meet my new friend, Lisa, in person and to hear Nithya Shanti and hopefully learn some of his teachings. I "randomly" connected with Lisa on Monday. Makes you wonder, doesn't it....
So, is gaining some new friendships via Facebook worth losing a dear friend of 10+ years? I'm not sure. I miss the solid friendship that we had, but if it hadn't been for the turmoil we're going through, I never would have reached out to others. Everything happens for a reason. I hope that with time, and effort from both of us, my friend and I will be able to find a shred of the relationship we once had, and hopefully even make it better. I also hope that some of the new connections I've made will have a lasting impact on my life, and help me better define what my purpose is on this Earth. While the circumstances with my friend suck, I do not regret being given an opportunity to better myself and learn from other positive people.
There is always a Moment of AHA.
Digging Deeper: Finding Answers in the Randomness
I've been trying to take a little time each day to examine what it is that makes me appreciative, happy, and accepting. Some days this is easier than others. On the days when I don't have any spectacular, huge Moments of AHA, I try to find little random pieces, such as singing to my kids, reading a book, listening to the birds... etc. On my last post, I had an interesting question posed to me: What is it about these things that make me happy? So I decided I should look a little deeper into it.
Spending time with my kids always makes me happy. Ok, maybe not *ALWAYS* but most of the time. I know that my kids love me unconditionally, even when I'm in a bad mood or cranky or when I just don't want to pay attention to them. A child's love is one of the greatest gifts I have ever been given. And I have three of them who love me! Being a mom is definitely not always easy, but it is by far the most rewarding thing I've ever done. Right now, as I'm typing this, my daughter is pulling my head sideways, trying to put a ponytail holder in my hair. A bit painful, but worth it. I just demonstrated how to put in a ponytail, and she watched, mesmerized and amazed as the ponytail stayed in place! How awesome to know that I can teach her things like that. I may not have all the answers in the world, but showing my daughter how to put in a ponytail is big on my list of accomplishments in her world!
Hearing my 2 year old sing songs to me is wonderful beyond words. It makes me smile every night and pride oozes from my pores. There is huge amounts of satisfaction in hearing your child repeat something that you've taught them. (Something good you've taught them, like the ABC's. The other night, I let a "dammit" slip out while he was in the room with me, and wouldn't you know, he repeated it right back to me. I quickly replaced that thought with "tartar sauce!" Thanks, Spongebob.)
Hearing my kids spew out facts, songs and stories that I've taught them boosts my self-esteem like almost nothing else I've ever experienced. Each time they hug my neck or give me a big, juicy kiss, I melt with joy. Every time I have an intelligent conversation with them about what they did that day or what they learned at school, I'm extremely proud that they've learned to be so articulate and well-spoken. My kids give me self-worth, no question.
My friends have also been huge ego-boosters. When I'm feeling down in the dumps, I know exactly which friends to call, and more often than not in 5 minutes I'm laughing and feeling better. I have a huge network of friends, family and acquaintances, all of whom love me to varying degrees and most of whom would probably do just about anything they could to help me if I needed it. My self-worth just went up another few notches. I am extremely fortunate to know the people I know and to have befriended the people I have. One of those friends told me not too long ago that I wasn't just lucky, I am fortunate and I have worked hard (whether or not I realized it) to attract the friends I have. That means the world to me, right along with unconditional love from my kids. Stay tuned... more explorations to come.
Spending time with my kids always makes me happy. Ok, maybe not *ALWAYS* but most of the time. I know that my kids love me unconditionally, even when I'm in a bad mood or cranky or when I just don't want to pay attention to them. A child's love is one of the greatest gifts I have ever been given. And I have three of them who love me! Being a mom is definitely not always easy, but it is by far the most rewarding thing I've ever done. Right now, as I'm typing this, my daughter is pulling my head sideways, trying to put a ponytail holder in my hair. A bit painful, but worth it. I just demonstrated how to put in a ponytail, and she watched, mesmerized and amazed as the ponytail stayed in place! How awesome to know that I can teach her things like that. I may not have all the answers in the world, but showing my daughter how to put in a ponytail is big on my list of accomplishments in her world!
Hearing my 2 year old sing songs to me is wonderful beyond words. It makes me smile every night and pride oozes from my pores. There is huge amounts of satisfaction in hearing your child repeat something that you've taught them. (Something good you've taught them, like the ABC's. The other night, I let a "dammit" slip out while he was in the room with me, and wouldn't you know, he repeated it right back to me. I quickly replaced that thought with "tartar sauce!" Thanks, Spongebob.)
Hearing my kids spew out facts, songs and stories that I've taught them boosts my self-esteem like almost nothing else I've ever experienced. Each time they hug my neck or give me a big, juicy kiss, I melt with joy. Every time I have an intelligent conversation with them about what they did that day or what they learned at school, I'm extremely proud that they've learned to be so articulate and well-spoken. My kids give me self-worth, no question.
My friends have also been huge ego-boosters. When I'm feeling down in the dumps, I know exactly which friends to call, and more often than not in 5 minutes I'm laughing and feeling better. I have a huge network of friends, family and acquaintances, all of whom love me to varying degrees and most of whom would probably do just about anything they could to help me if I needed it. My self-worth just went up another few notches. I am extremely fortunate to know the people I know and to have befriended the people I have. One of those friends told me not too long ago that I wasn't just lucky, I am fortunate and I have worked hard (whether or not I realized it) to attract the friends I have. That means the world to me, right along with unconditional love from my kids. Stay tuned... more explorations to come.
More Randomness
More random Moments of AHA:
-singing "I love you" songs to my 2-year-old, and having him replace his name with "Mama" as he sings them back to me
-telling my oldest, "I love you past space" and hearing him respond "I love you even more"
-when my daughter wraps her arms around my neck and won't let go
-music in the park
-cool, breezy summer days enjoyed outside
-watching my kids throw finger paint all over the driveway... and themselves
-hearing my youngest say "I help too" when he sees me pulling weeds up, then having my older two join in, as well
-planning my back yard garden
-buying a compost tumbler (yes, I am inexplicably excited about this)
-completing a household project by myself, albeit a very small project
-reading quotes from Eckhart Tolle that seem to speak directly to me
-figuring out what I truly want/need out of life (ok, truthfully, I'm not even close to figuring this out completely, but I'm doing my best to make the most of the journey)
-singing "I love you" songs to my 2-year-old, and having him replace his name with "Mama" as he sings them back to me
-telling my oldest, "I love you past space" and hearing him respond "I love you even more"
-when my daughter wraps her arms around my neck and won't let go
-music in the park
-cool, breezy summer days enjoyed outside
-watching my kids throw finger paint all over the driveway... and themselves
-hearing my youngest say "I help too" when he sees me pulling weeds up, then having my older two join in, as well
-planning my back yard garden
-buying a compost tumbler (yes, I am inexplicably excited about this)
-completing a household project by myself, albeit a very small project
-reading quotes from Eckhart Tolle that seem to speak directly to me
-figuring out what I truly want/need out of life (ok, truthfully, I'm not even close to figuring this out completely, but I'm doing my best to make the most of the journey)
The Most Beautiful Noise
[Public apology to my husband: Apparently I was mistaken and he did not purchase the kazoo. Neither did I, neither did my in-laws. Which leaves my side of the family as the gracious culprits. Sorry, dear Gary, for the inaccurate accusation.]
Next time you happen to see my husband, please let him know how incredibly grateful I am that he bought a kazoo for our 2-year-old's birthday! I suppose there could be worse things for him to have at age 2, but the kazoo was slowly creeping it's way to the top of my "to be banned" list today.
My kids decided they would have a parade, complete with kazoo, bongo drums and a tambourine thingy. I say "thingy" because it wasn't actually a tambourine. It was the thing with the plastic pins in it that creates impressions when something is pressed against the pins. I think this thing is worse than a tambourine. Or at least louder. Anyway, they followed one another around and around the living room, each playing their own instrument and marching along. It was actually kind of cute, and I realized that I would just ruin their fun by telling them not to hum into the kazoo so loudly, so I let them be. Plus, I was kind of afraid that if I told my youngest to keep it down, he would just yell louder (this is what he does).
My oldest son called it a bazooka, which just made me laugh, and my youngest called it a "tat-ta-phone" (saxophone), which also made me laugh. They paraded around for probably a good hour before I just couldn't handle the noise any more. I suggested we go out for a walk, and they all agreed, then my youngest stuck the dang kazoo in his pocket to bring with us. Luckily, I think he got too distracted by the outside sights and sounds, so he didn't try to serenade our neighborhood.
I suppose the kazoo is a good gift in the sense that all the kids love to play with it, and my youngest is quite sure to point out his ownership of it, lest anyone attempt to disagree. And they did enjoy themselves marching around the house with it. Whether I think it's annoying or not is irrelevant. It's his gift, and he loves it, so that makes it a good thing. Thanks for the great gift, and thanks for the AHA!
Next time you happen to see my husband, please let him know how incredibly grateful I am that he bought a kazoo for our 2-year-old's birthday! I suppose there could be worse things for him to have at age 2, but the kazoo was slowly creeping it's way to the top of my "to be banned" list today.
My kids decided they would have a parade, complete with kazoo, bongo drums and a tambourine thingy. I say "thingy" because it wasn't actually a tambourine. It was the thing with the plastic pins in it that creates impressions when something is pressed against the pins. I think this thing is worse than a tambourine. Or at least louder. Anyway, they followed one another around and around the living room, each playing their own instrument and marching along. It was actually kind of cute, and I realized that I would just ruin their fun by telling them not to hum into the kazoo so loudly, so I let them be. Plus, I was kind of afraid that if I told my youngest to keep it down, he would just yell louder (this is what he does).
My oldest son called it a bazooka, which just made me laugh, and my youngest called it a "tat-ta-phone" (saxophone), which also made me laugh. They paraded around for probably a good hour before I just couldn't handle the noise any more. I suggested we go out for a walk, and they all agreed, then my youngest stuck the dang kazoo in his pocket to bring with us. Luckily, I think he got too distracted by the outside sights and sounds, so he didn't try to serenade our neighborhood.
I suppose the kazoo is a good gift in the sense that all the kids love to play with it, and my youngest is quite sure to point out his ownership of it, lest anyone attempt to disagree. And they did enjoy themselves marching around the house with it. Whether I think it's annoying or not is irrelevant. It's his gift, and he loves it, so that makes it a good thing. Thanks for the great gift, and thanks for the AHA!
My Two Cents
I took my kids to the drive-in tonight to see Despicable Me. We cleaned out the back of the van, put the back seats down, threw in some blankets and mini-chocolate bars, and away we went! They were all so excited to go, even the youngest, and I'm not completely convinced that he fully understood what we were doing until we got there. But with such energy from the other two, it was understandable that he was excited too!
I won't spoil any of the movie plot, because it really has no bearing on what I'm writing in this post. But I will say that the overall movie was well done, very funny, quite appropriate for all ages, and it did have a moral at the end. I had a fabulous time sitting in the back of my van, watching my kids stare at the movie screen and laugh. We ate popcorn and chocolate in the dark, my legs and ankles got bit up by mosquitoes (even after I put bug spray on....damn mosquitoes), and even though we left after only one movie, it made for a verrrrrry long night. But it was so worth it. My oldest son thanked me I don't know how many times, and they talked about their favorite parts of the movie the whole way home.
I have always been very .... stingy, I guess is a good word, with money. I enjoy spending it, but I think sometimes I know I enjoy spending it, so I overcompensate in the other direction and try really hard to find ways and reasons not to spend any money. (Just to be clear, this method has usually backfired on me, and someone in the family ends up getting upset.) So I've allowed myself to treat the kids to something that costs a little money every now and then. We don't eat out every night, but it's ok if I would rather order pizza on Friday instead of cooking the steak that's been thawing in the sink all day. It's ok to take them to the drive in, even for one movie, because it's a heck of a lot less expensive and more intimate than a movie theater. It's ok to buy my son a Slim Jim once in a while just because he likes them. It's ok to go bowling now and then because I know they all enjoy it, and chances are we'll all have a really great time.
Spending money comes (too) naturally to me. Spending money wisely (or at least not stupidly) has been a learned experience, and is one I'm still working to improve. Money definitely is not everything. Yes, it helps, but we've all heard the success "Cinderella" stories of sports stars and celebs who came from the worst poverty since the 18th century and struggled through to make their way to the top. Not everyone is going to make their way to the tippy top, but we can all learn to appreciate what we have and how to make the most of our money and the people/things around us. We don't always need money to have a good time and enjoy the company of others. It's ok to accept that sometimes we just have to be frugal. But it's also ok to accept that once in a while it wouldn't kill us to spend a few bucks and do something awesome, something that makes us happy.
I won't spoil any of the movie plot, because it really has no bearing on what I'm writing in this post. But I will say that the overall movie was well done, very funny, quite appropriate for all ages, and it did have a moral at the end. I had a fabulous time sitting in the back of my van, watching my kids stare at the movie screen and laugh. We ate popcorn and chocolate in the dark, my legs and ankles got bit up by mosquitoes (even after I put bug spray on....damn mosquitoes), and even though we left after only one movie, it made for a verrrrrry long night. But it was so worth it. My oldest son thanked me I don't know how many times, and they talked about their favorite parts of the movie the whole way home.
I have always been very .... stingy, I guess is a good word, with money. I enjoy spending it, but I think sometimes I know I enjoy spending it, so I overcompensate in the other direction and try really hard to find ways and reasons not to spend any money. (Just to be clear, this method has usually backfired on me, and someone in the family ends up getting upset.) So I've allowed myself to treat the kids to something that costs a little money every now and then. We don't eat out every night, but it's ok if I would rather order pizza on Friday instead of cooking the steak that's been thawing in the sink all day. It's ok to take them to the drive in, even for one movie, because it's a heck of a lot less expensive and more intimate than a movie theater. It's ok to buy my son a Slim Jim once in a while just because he likes them. It's ok to go bowling now and then because I know they all enjoy it, and chances are we'll all have a really great time.
Spending money comes (too) naturally to me. Spending money wisely (or at least not stupidly) has been a learned experience, and is one I'm still working to improve. Money definitely is not everything. Yes, it helps, but we've all heard the success "Cinderella" stories of sports stars and celebs who came from the worst poverty since the 18th century and struggled through to make their way to the top. Not everyone is going to make their way to the tippy top, but we can all learn to appreciate what we have and how to make the most of our money and the people/things around us. We don't always need money to have a good time and enjoy the company of others. It's ok to accept that sometimes we just have to be frugal. But it's also ok to accept that once in a while it wouldn't kill us to spend a few bucks and do something awesome, something that makes us happy.
Random Moments
Random moments of AHA...
-Singing bedtime songs to my youngest, and having him sing along - in tune!
-While putting my youngest to bed, I said to him, "I love you past space." And in his two-year-old little language, he said, "Ah lah lou pas space, Mama."
-Today is my baby's second birthday. How amazing. He is awesome. He spent a majority of the day singing "Happy Birthday" to himself.
-Watching my 3 kids play with a couple of friends from day care, and hanging out with the moms and dads!
-Getting compliments on what a great big brother my oldest is, and what a great big sister my daughter is.
-Listening to my oldest read to his little sister.
-Chatting with friends, and venting when I need to.
-When my daughter holds my hand out and plants a big kiss in the middle of my palm, then tells me to hold on to it.
-Hearing my kids say, "I love you!"
May you be blessed with plenty of these tiny Moments of AHA that make life worthwhile.
-Singing bedtime songs to my youngest, and having him sing along - in tune!
-While putting my youngest to bed, I said to him, "I love you past space." And in his two-year-old little language, he said, "Ah lah lou pas space, Mama."
-Today is my baby's second birthday. How amazing. He is awesome. He spent a majority of the day singing "Happy Birthday" to himself.
-Watching my 3 kids play with a couple of friends from day care, and hanging out with the moms and dads!
-Getting compliments on what a great big brother my oldest is, and what a great big sister my daughter is.
-Listening to my oldest read to his little sister.
-Chatting with friends, and venting when I need to.
-When my daughter holds my hand out and plants a big kiss in the middle of my palm, then tells me to hold on to it.
-Hearing my kids say, "I love you!"
May you be blessed with plenty of these tiny Moments of AHA that make life worthwhile.
Bring On the Praise
There were plenty Moments of AHA today, and the past few days, but I think the one that meant the most to me came at the very end of today. But before I can tell you that story, I have to tell you this one...
As you may recall, my sister got married at the end of June. Today was the wedding reception. The girls got to wear our bridesmaid dresses once again, and the guys wore nice, blue button-down shirts with black dress slacks and ties. I gave the toast to the bride and groom (which I wrote literally an hour beforehand), we had our buffet dinner, and went through the typical wedding reception traditions like the cutting (and smearing) of the cake, the bridal dance, the father/daughter and mother/son dances, etc.
My youngest son was assigned family "babysitters" since he was the only one in the immediate family not involved with the wedding party... and cannot be trusted to his own devices. My cousin and her husband were the main sitters, and one of my good friends helped out a lot as well. Along with my three kids, my sister's two step-sons were there, and they all had a fabulous time! Many of the adults, I think, had a great time watching the kids have a great time!
There were quite a lot of family members and friends in attendance whom I haven't seen in some time. Just about everyone I spoke to complimented me on my kids and said how impressed they are at how grown up my oldest is, how lovely my daughter is, and how big and active my youngest is. It made me proud to have so many people say so many nice things about my kids. At the end of the reception, I thanked my babysitters profusely, and they all agreed that it was very fun and entertaining to watch him.
When we got home, I tucked the kids in bed and told each of them how proud I was of them. I said I was glad they had such a good time, and it made me very happy that they were so well behaved. I told my oldest that lots of people complimented me on him, and how much they enjoyed talking with him. As I told him I could see his eyes sparkle with pride. Total AHA!
I love getting praise about my kids because it means that I'm doing something right in the crazy world of parenting. But more so, I love giving my kids well-deserved praise, because I can see it in their faces when they are proud of themselves. That, right there, is AHA that is so worth seeing!
As you may recall, my sister got married at the end of June. Today was the wedding reception. The girls got to wear our bridesmaid dresses once again, and the guys wore nice, blue button-down shirts with black dress slacks and ties. I gave the toast to the bride and groom (which I wrote literally an hour beforehand), we had our buffet dinner, and went through the typical wedding reception traditions like the cutting (and smearing) of the cake, the bridal dance, the father/daughter and mother/son dances, etc.
My youngest son was assigned family "babysitters" since he was the only one in the immediate family not involved with the wedding party... and cannot be trusted to his own devices. My cousin and her husband were the main sitters, and one of my good friends helped out a lot as well. Along with my three kids, my sister's two step-sons were there, and they all had a fabulous time! Many of the adults, I think, had a great time watching the kids have a great time!
There were quite a lot of family members and friends in attendance whom I haven't seen in some time. Just about everyone I spoke to complimented me on my kids and said how impressed they are at how grown up my oldest is, how lovely my daughter is, and how big and active my youngest is. It made me proud to have so many people say so many nice things about my kids. At the end of the reception, I thanked my babysitters profusely, and they all agreed that it was very fun and entertaining to watch him.
When we got home, I tucked the kids in bed and told each of them how proud I was of them. I said I was glad they had such a good time, and it made me very happy that they were so well behaved. I told my oldest that lots of people complimented me on him, and how much they enjoyed talking with him. As I told him I could see his eyes sparkle with pride. Total AHA!
I love getting praise about my kids because it means that I'm doing something right in the crazy world of parenting. But more so, I love giving my kids well-deserved praise, because I can see it in their faces when they are proud of themselves. That, right there, is AHA that is so worth seeing!
The Best Feeling Ever
The past few days have been filled with Moments of AHA, and once again most of them came from friends.
This past Tuesday, I had a stage band rehearsal. Music was fun, and company was great. Lots of laughs in between songs, and plenty of good conversations. Wednesday was the stage band gig, and once again lots of laughs and between-song-conversing. Always a great time, even if the style of music isn't my favorite.
After the gig, I went to a local watering hole and hung out with some friends from the band and associated spouses. I hadn't been there 15 minutes, when in walked a dear friend of mine from college, who now lives in Florida!! The sneaky monkey was in town for family festivities and didn't tell very many people he was coming. (He's actually quite famous for this. One year, around Christmastime, he called me and after chatting for a few minutes, he revealed that he was in his car in my driveway! He likes surprises.) He and I were very close in our college days, and although distance has come between us, each time we talk or see one another it's as if no time has passed at all. I absolutely love hanging out and talking with him. We stayed at the bar for quite a while after the rest of our group had departed. It was so wonderful to catch up one on one, and share things have been going on in my life, as well as listening to things going on in his.
Today after work, I met up with another dear friend from college. This friend lives in the area, and although we were also very close in college, we went in our own separate directions after graduation, and distance kept us from seeing each other very often. But we have reconnected for a number of different reasons, and it's been wonderful.
I've always considered myself a very loyal friend, and I've always been very passionate about my friends. Laughing with a good friend is one of the best feelings in the world. I had a group of girls I hung out with in middle school, and whenever we went to the library, inevitably, someone would get a case of the giggles. The librarians hated us, because we would *always* giggle and laugh. At who knows what! At nothing! It was just the fact that we were supposed to be quiet, I think, that sparked that initial snicker. And when you try to stifle a good ol' belly laugh, it just makes things worse. So there we sat, 5 or 6 middle school girls, all trying not to laugh loudly at one another. Snorting and snarking and making all sorts of interesting noises. I'm telling you- those librarians hated us, but we always left the library exhausted, out of breath and with a sore gut! Best feeling ever!
Hanging with friends now is no different. Well, except that we can laugh out loud - as loud as we want - at anything we want, for as long as we want! And isn't that just a spectacular feeling! No matter what the topic of conversation, there are certain friends we each have who can spark a laugh in us. Laughing is contagious, if you've ever noticed. Once one person laughs, usually someone else joins in and before long the whole darn crowd is laughing and most of the time, no one can remember what started it!
I love laughing. And I love hanging out with my friends. Good thing the people I choose to spend time with can make me laugh! A lot. Keep it coming, dear friends. Keep the laughter loud and strong, and you'll keep yourself healthy for a long time. Laughter = AHA.
This past Tuesday, I had a stage band rehearsal. Music was fun, and company was great. Lots of laughs in between songs, and plenty of good conversations. Wednesday was the stage band gig, and once again lots of laughs and between-song-conversing. Always a great time, even if the style of music isn't my favorite.
After the gig, I went to a local watering hole and hung out with some friends from the band and associated spouses. I hadn't been there 15 minutes, when in walked a dear friend of mine from college, who now lives in Florida!! The sneaky monkey was in town for family festivities and didn't tell very many people he was coming. (He's actually quite famous for this. One year, around Christmastime, he called me and after chatting for a few minutes, he revealed that he was in his car in my driveway! He likes surprises.) He and I were very close in our college days, and although distance has come between us, each time we talk or see one another it's as if no time has passed at all. I absolutely love hanging out and talking with him. We stayed at the bar for quite a while after the rest of our group had departed. It was so wonderful to catch up one on one, and share things have been going on in my life, as well as listening to things going on in his.
Today after work, I met up with another dear friend from college. This friend lives in the area, and although we were also very close in college, we went in our own separate directions after graduation, and distance kept us from seeing each other very often. But we have reconnected for a number of different reasons, and it's been wonderful.
I've always considered myself a very loyal friend, and I've always been very passionate about my friends. Laughing with a good friend is one of the best feelings in the world. I had a group of girls I hung out with in middle school, and whenever we went to the library, inevitably, someone would get a case of the giggles. The librarians hated us, because we would *always* giggle and laugh. At who knows what! At nothing! It was just the fact that we were supposed to be quiet, I think, that sparked that initial snicker. And when you try to stifle a good ol' belly laugh, it just makes things worse. So there we sat, 5 or 6 middle school girls, all trying not to laugh loudly at one another. Snorting and snarking and making all sorts of interesting noises. I'm telling you- those librarians hated us, but we always left the library exhausted, out of breath and with a sore gut! Best feeling ever!
Hanging with friends now is no different. Well, except that we can laugh out loud - as loud as we want - at anything we want, for as long as we want! And isn't that just a spectacular feeling! No matter what the topic of conversation, there are certain friends we each have who can spark a laugh in us. Laughing is contagious, if you've ever noticed. Once one person laughs, usually someone else joins in and before long the whole darn crowd is laughing and most of the time, no one can remember what started it!
I love laughing. And I love hanging out with my friends. Good thing the people I choose to spend time with can make me laugh! A lot. Keep it coming, dear friends. Keep the laughter loud and strong, and you'll keep yourself healthy for a long time. Laughter = AHA.
How the Deli Counter Altered My Mood
It sometimes amazes me how our attitude can change based on the attitudes of those around us. Here's an example.
I was in a decent mood this afternoon. I was not having a spectacular day, but not a bad day either, just kind of right down the middle. I stopped at the grocery store on my way home from work, and impulsively decided to buy some deli meat. I waited behind the three other people at the counter, and the two clerks behind the deli counter were moving along kind of slowly.
Clerk 1: "You said a pound and a half, right? A pound and a half?"
Annoyed female customer: "Just ONE pound."
Clerk 1 (with a slight snotty twinge in her voice): "Oh, sorry."
Clerk 1 continued slicing up the meat, but was moving v-e-r-y slowly. The woman waiting looked very annoyed. As I watched the clerk move oh so slowly, and as I looked at the annoyed woman waiting, I couldn't help but notice that I was suddenly not in a very good mood anymore. I felt slightly annoyed myself, even though I hadn't even made it to the counter yet. I immediately smiled, for no reason, and made myself look happy just so as not to continue the feeling of being annoyed.
Clerk 2: "Can I help you?"
Male customer: "I'd just like a couple of hot dogs."
Clerk 2 (as she's turning to walk away): "The Hoffmans?"
Customer: "Yeah."
Clerk 1 to female customer: "Anything else?"
Annoyed female customer: "A pound of the [something or other] Swiss cheese."
Clerk 1 ambled back over to the cheese section of the counter.
Clerk 2:" Here you go."
Male customer: "Thanks." He looked like he was in a little bit of a hurry and left quickly.
Clerk 2: "Can I help you?"
Me: "I'd like a quarter pound of the ham and a quarter pound of the turkey, please."
Clerk 2 picked up the package of ham from the counter and walked (slowly) to the slicer. "You said a half pound?"
Me: "Quarter pound, please." I began to wonder if it was in their training to upsell the customer by offering more than what was originally requested.
Clerk 2 finished slicing both the ham and the turkey, I smiled, thanked her and turned to leave the counter. Clerk 1 was still slicing cheese, and the annoyed female customer looked as annoyed as ever. I smiled politely at her.
As I walked away, I remembered when I was in retail. I never worked in a grocery store, but I worked in other retail stores and I would sometimes go along with my husband when he stocked beer in grocery stores. Truth be known, I pretty much hated retail. It had it's moments of goodness and some of the jobs I had gave me pretty cool perks, but I am not cut out to work in retail the rest of my life. I tried my best not to be the cranky clerk that no one wants to go to. And a lot of days, I managed to stay in a pretty good mood when talking with the customers. But, boy-oh-boy, when you get that one really nasty customer, it's tough to keep that smile on your face.
There's a saying I heard when I first started working in radio. Never let the listener know what kind of day you're having. No matter what, the listeners have to think that today is your best day ever. That I, as the announcer, am in the best mood I've ever been in. I think that kind of principal can be applied to retail, and really to just about any situation. Just because I'm having a crappy day doesn't mean that I should impose my bad mood on the rest of the world.
Don't get me wrong, sometimes it's really hard to cover up the fact that you're in a lousy mood. And I don't think that any of us expect anyone else to be in a super-fantastic mood 100% of the time. But generally speaking, I think it's a pretty good rule to follow to let everyone believe that you're having a good day, whether you are or not. If you can lighten up your bad mood just enough to smile at someone else, you never know- maybe you cheered them up. And hopefully they will smile back, and cheer you up too. We all have the power to share the AHA in the littlest things. Like smiling at others.
I was in a decent mood this afternoon. I was not having a spectacular day, but not a bad day either, just kind of right down the middle. I stopped at the grocery store on my way home from work, and impulsively decided to buy some deli meat. I waited behind the three other people at the counter, and the two clerks behind the deli counter were moving along kind of slowly.
Clerk 1: "You said a pound and a half, right? A pound and a half?"
Annoyed female customer: "Just ONE pound."
Clerk 1 (with a slight snotty twinge in her voice): "Oh, sorry."
Clerk 1 continued slicing up the meat, but was moving v-e-r-y slowly. The woman waiting looked very annoyed. As I watched the clerk move oh so slowly, and as I looked at the annoyed woman waiting, I couldn't help but notice that I was suddenly not in a very good mood anymore. I felt slightly annoyed myself, even though I hadn't even made it to the counter yet. I immediately smiled, for no reason, and made myself look happy just so as not to continue the feeling of being annoyed.
Clerk 2: "Can I help you?"
Male customer: "I'd just like a couple of hot dogs."
Clerk 2 (as she's turning to walk away): "The Hoffmans?"
Customer: "Yeah."
Clerk 1 to female customer: "Anything else?"
Annoyed female customer: "A pound of the [something or other] Swiss cheese."
Clerk 1 ambled back over to the cheese section of the counter.
Clerk 2:" Here you go."
Male customer: "Thanks." He looked like he was in a little bit of a hurry and left quickly.
Clerk 2: "Can I help you?"
Me: "I'd like a quarter pound of the ham and a quarter pound of the turkey, please."
Clerk 2 picked up the package of ham from the counter and walked (slowly) to the slicer. "You said a half pound?"
Me: "Quarter pound, please." I began to wonder if it was in their training to upsell the customer by offering more than what was originally requested.
Clerk 2 finished slicing both the ham and the turkey, I smiled, thanked her and turned to leave the counter. Clerk 1 was still slicing cheese, and the annoyed female customer looked as annoyed as ever. I smiled politely at her.
As I walked away, I remembered when I was in retail. I never worked in a grocery store, but I worked in other retail stores and I would sometimes go along with my husband when he stocked beer in grocery stores. Truth be known, I pretty much hated retail. It had it's moments of goodness and some of the jobs I had gave me pretty cool perks, but I am not cut out to work in retail the rest of my life. I tried my best not to be the cranky clerk that no one wants to go to. And a lot of days, I managed to stay in a pretty good mood when talking with the customers. But, boy-oh-boy, when you get that one really nasty customer, it's tough to keep that smile on your face.
There's a saying I heard when I first started working in radio. Never let the listener know what kind of day you're having. No matter what, the listeners have to think that today is your best day ever. That I, as the announcer, am in the best mood I've ever been in. I think that kind of principal can be applied to retail, and really to just about any situation. Just because I'm having a crappy day doesn't mean that I should impose my bad mood on the rest of the world.
Don't get me wrong, sometimes it's really hard to cover up the fact that you're in a lousy mood. And I don't think that any of us expect anyone else to be in a super-fantastic mood 100% of the time. But generally speaking, I think it's a pretty good rule to follow to let everyone believe that you're having a good day, whether you are or not. If you can lighten up your bad mood just enough to smile at someone else, you never know- maybe you cheered them up. And hopefully they will smile back, and cheer you up too. We all have the power to share the AHA in the littlest things. Like smiling at others.
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