I have always been a fairly private person. I don't usually like to have face to face conflicts, especially not in front of other people. I tend to keep my problems to myself, but am kind of an open book and when I'm having a really bad day, most people can tell. I've always also been very shy. It used to take me a very long time to really open up and talk with people. However, most of these things (if you hadn't already noticed) have changed.
When it became very obvious that there was not going to be an easy "fix" to my marriage problems, I spent a lot of time crying by myself. I didn't want to tell anyone what was happening, partly I think because I was embarrassed or ashamed, and partly because I was convinced that if I put enough time, thought, effort and energy into it, I could fix things myself. Neither of these are very logical, obviously. It took me a number of months before I finally called someone to talk about it. Slowly, I began to grasp onto the fact that other people could help, if by no other means than just to listen and let me vent things out. I also began to grasp that there were a lot of people out there who really care about me and wanted to help. Reaching out was never a very easy thing for me to do, but once I did, it became easier and easier to talk to people, to let my emotions out, to get their opinions and/or suggestions... to let myself be openly vulnerable.
In the time that has passed since I first let out that my marriage was falling apart, I have strengthened friendships that had already been there for a long time, I have gained friendships and grown closer with people I had previously called casual friends or acquaintances, I've gotten to know people via Facebook whom I have a lot in common with, I've met completely new people. I've allowed myself to be vulnerable, but also made myself be strong. 10, 5, even 2 years ago, I don't think "inspirational" would have been a word I used to describe myself, and now I seem to hear that from all sorts of people, almost daily.
Another thing that I've learned about myself which I don't think was utilized to it's full potential previously- I love helping others, being there for them, talking with them, listening to them, understanding them. I don't have an extremely exciting life; the past year or 18 months was rocky, but life could have been much worse for me. I haven't lived through any traumatic, life-threatening situations. I have 3 healthy kids, I've worked radio jobs most of my life (which, in case you were wondering, are not high-stress types of jobs), I grew up in and now live in suburbia, and I'm divorced. However, despite the lack of "excitement" on my life resume, I think that after (almost) 38 years, I have a lot of experience. I have stories to tell, advice to give, rules to live by, opinions, suggestions, memories, ideas... and I'm happy to share any of them.
To anyone who reads this blog but doesn't comment, please know that I appreciate your silent support. To anyone who comments, whether I know who you are or not, please know that I appreciate your thoughts, comments, questions, feedback and support. To the Anonymous person who said they don't have any "people"- you have me. So many people have given to me throughout my whole life, especially when I needed it the most, I would be completely selfish and stupid to not try to give at least a portion of that love back to others. I believe in Karma. And I believe in Paying It Forward. Love others, and you'll get that love back, ten-fold. Never be afraid to reach out. Because you never know what will come of it, or where it will bring you.
Cheers!
Be What You Can Be
When I was in college, I was broke. There would be times (quite often, according to them) when I would call up some friends and essentially invite myself over for dinner. This is something my mother taught me not to do, and I strive now to dissuade my 3 kids from calling friends to say, "Hey, can I come over?" That's just not polite. But somehow I managed to do it to these particular friends, and they seemed not to mind.
Somehow, by coincidence or whatever, on days when I would have dinner at my friends' house, they would either plan to have, or just ended up having spaghetti. This has become our tradition. And a wonderful tradition it is! Yesterday, I sent them a message and simply asked if they were free for dinner. I was thinking we could meet at a restaurant, or something. Well, they invited me to their house for.... Garden Goulash. Not quite spaghetti, but close. To make Garden Goulash, they take whatever veggies they can find in their fridge, throw them in a dish with pasta and some tomato sauce, cover it with cheese and pop it into the oven. YUM!! So, I guess my dinners with them have matured to variations on pasta and sauce.
At the end of dinner, my hostess brought out, as she usually does, a few small plastic containers and offered them to me to take home leftovers. As I was scooping heaping spoonful after heaping spoonful of the wonderful Garden Goulash into these containers, I started to feel guilty. I laughed and said, "I invite myself to dinner, then take the leftovers. What a great friend I am!" My host smiled, looked at me and said, "You didn't invite yourself. You were simply letting us know when you were free." Then he said, in a slightly more serious tone, "There are a thousand things we can't be. This, we can. We'll be what we can be."
This is not the first time he has said this to me, nor will it be last, I imagine. There is good sentiment in that statement... Be what you can be. So many times when our friends have problems, or are hurting, we want to solve it all for them and do anything we can to make it go away. In reality, we, as outsiders to the problem, can usually do very little to solve it. However, we can be good role models, friends, supports, sounding boards, venting outlets, a shoulder to cry on... or good dinner company. Be what you can be, for whoever needs you. When you need it, chances are someone will be there for you.
Cheers!
Somehow, by coincidence or whatever, on days when I would have dinner at my friends' house, they would either plan to have, or just ended up having spaghetti. This has become our tradition. And a wonderful tradition it is! Yesterday, I sent them a message and simply asked if they were free for dinner. I was thinking we could meet at a restaurant, or something. Well, they invited me to their house for.... Garden Goulash. Not quite spaghetti, but close. To make Garden Goulash, they take whatever veggies they can find in their fridge, throw them in a dish with pasta and some tomato sauce, cover it with cheese and pop it into the oven. YUM!! So, I guess my dinners with them have matured to variations on pasta and sauce.
At the end of dinner, my hostess brought out, as she usually does, a few small plastic containers and offered them to me to take home leftovers. As I was scooping heaping spoonful after heaping spoonful of the wonderful Garden Goulash into these containers, I started to feel guilty. I laughed and said, "I invite myself to dinner, then take the leftovers. What a great friend I am!" My host smiled, looked at me and said, "You didn't invite yourself. You were simply letting us know when you were free." Then he said, in a slightly more serious tone, "There are a thousand things we can't be. This, we can. We'll be what we can be."
This is not the first time he has said this to me, nor will it be last, I imagine. There is good sentiment in that statement... Be what you can be. So many times when our friends have problems, or are hurting, we want to solve it all for them and do anything we can to make it go away. In reality, we, as outsiders to the problem, can usually do very little to solve it. However, we can be good role models, friends, supports, sounding boards, venting outlets, a shoulder to cry on... or good dinner company. Be what you can be, for whoever needs you. When you need it, chances are someone will be there for you.
Cheers!
Fate, Through Quotations
Do you believe in Fate? That whatever you need will pop up at just the time in the just the right place? Do you believe in Coincidence? Maybe they are one and the same...
I recently decided to take a leap of faith, of sorts, and change my hours at work. Something I had wanted to do since my daughter was born, but my husband and I always seemed to talk ourselves out of it. Money was just too tight. In about 6 months my daughter will go to school. For the past 5 years, we've been shuffling around our oldest son after school. We've been lucky enough to not have to enroll him in any kind of afterschool program. Grandparents and friends have always helped us out. Now, with the divorce and the second child on the brink of Kindergarten, I decided that I needed to take more responsibility in their afterschool whereabouts. So I took a chance and asked my boss if I could cut back my hours. To my surprise, I was given the green light.
I receive daily inspirational quotes via email. Sometimes I don't get to read them every day, so they pile up in my inbox and I end up reading 5 or 6 at a time. The day that I was told I could cut my hours, I read these quotes:
I recently decided to take a leap of faith, of sorts, and change my hours at work. Something I had wanted to do since my daughter was born, but my husband and I always seemed to talk ourselves out of it. Money was just too tight. In about 6 months my daughter will go to school. For the past 5 years, we've been shuffling around our oldest son after school. We've been lucky enough to not have to enroll him in any kind of afterschool program. Grandparents and friends have always helped us out. Now, with the divorce and the second child on the brink of Kindergarten, I decided that I needed to take more responsibility in their afterschool whereabouts. So I took a chance and asked my boss if I could cut back my hours. To my surprise, I was given the green light.
I receive daily inspirational quotes via email. Sometimes I don't get to read them every day, so they pile up in my inbox and I end up reading 5 or 6 at a time. The day that I was told I could cut my hours, I read these quotes:
"The wisest men follow their own direction."- Euripides |
"The years in your life are less important than the life in your years."- Ralph Waldo Emerson
"We will either find a way, or make one."- Hannibal
"To the timid and hesitating everything is impossible because it seems so."- Walter Scott
So... Coincidence? Fate? Reading too far into a situation? I'm not sure, but it made some of my hesitation disappear to read all these. Sure, I'll have a little less income. Yes, things are fairly tight now, and they will be more so with a smaller paycheck. But I will be able to pick up my kids after school and not have to find places for them to stay all the time. I'll be home earlier, which (hopefully) means I can start dinner earlier, and baths earlier and have more time to actually talk with them in the evening, instead of constantly telling them to hurry up so they can go to bed.
Positive thinking.... Positive thinking has supposedly gotten many people to better places in their lives, and I hope to do the same. I have a viable side business that I put on the back burner at the end of 2009. I have just recently started focusing more on that, and now with less of a paycheck, I need to explore other ways of cutting expenses and increasing income. So my creative juices are flowing, albeit slowly now, but I'm getting back into the groove and am putting together a plan of how to utilize the resources I have in front of me. Feels good, and I'm going to make it work.
I'm still a bit skeptical as to whether I completely believe in Fate. But, when I really take a look at my life, things seem to fall into place quite nicely. And now, I can't help but look at a situation and think, "How is this going to change my life? What purpose does this person or event have in being here, right now?" I don't expect the answers to jump out at me, and sometimes the purpose of a person or event is so subtle that I don't realize said purpose until much later. That's part of the beauty of Fate, I guess, is that you never really know what role it plays until after the fact.
All I know is that I've finally made a way to follow my own direction, add some life to my years, and overcome what was once deemed impossible. It'll be tough, but it's worth the effort!
Cheers! :)
Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes
Life is full of changes. Changes can take all sorts of shapes, sizes, variations... they can be expected or not, they can be beneficial or harmful, they can be big or little, they can be quick or take a long time. Regardless of the shape, size or variation, we can make positive things happen because said changes, if we really want to.
I am facing quite a number of changes right now. Some of them were brought on by my own choice, others were presented to me by someone else. Although I can't go into details for some of them, I'll share a few that I can.
Since my youngest was born in 2008, I have wanted to lose a little weight and tone up my stomach. I am not out to lose 100 pounds (even I know that would be really bad), and I most likely will not turn into a fitness fanatic overnight, but I do need to increase my physical activity, as well as my healthy food intake. I cannot afford, nor do I have the schedule, to join a gym. So I bought Wii Zumba. I had never done Zumba, and when I first tried it, I fell in love with it. One might say that I'm slightly addicted to it. Although I still don't exercise in any sort of regular intervals, once I start on Zumba, I could do it for hours. I've been trying to take advantage of some outdoor activities,too, like snowshoeing with my son's class or ice skating at the college Campus Center. As soon as the weather turns just a little nicer, I plan to take a short walk twice a day, at least two or three days a week, by parking on the opposite side of campus and walking into work. A gym routine I can't do. These kind of activities, I can, and I plan to make it more of a priority to move just a little more every day. I know these little changes will not result in having a super-toned body, but if it will help me feel better and get my muscles moving, then I'll do it.
As for eating better, I was presented with quite a huge challenge today. A friend of mine is starting a 40-day raw vegan diet, and she's invited others to join her. Whereas I've never even been a vegetarian for more than an hour or two, going completely raw vegan would be way too big a drastic change for my body to handle or for my mind to accept. For those who are interested, a raw vegan diet (from what I understand) consists only of raw fruit, veggies, sprouts, nuts, seeds, oils, and juices. No meat products, or foods cooked above 116 degrees Fahrenheit. I'm going to take this challenge and revise it a bit to better fit my budget, lifestyle and opportunity (with 3 kids in the house, buying food for 2 completely different meals every time we eat just doesn't make sense). For me, this challenge is going to mean simply much more raw fruits, veggies, nuts, sprouts, etc and much less sugar, processed food, junk food, and such. I'm going to force myself to choose grapes and a banana over cheese crackers and granola bars for a snack. Won't be easy, but I'm hoping that the benefits of eating healthier and doing more exercise will pay off in the end.
There are some job-related changes on the horizon, as well. I can't go into detail about this just yet, but I'm excited about the possibilities that these changes could open up. My responsibilities will be shifting and I should be able to do more of what I like to do, which is a very good thing. This also gives me the chance to improve some of my skills and use more creativity, also very good things.
I'm also brainstorming more than ever how to boost up my business and sales with Creative Memories. This side business, which I absolutely love, has been pushed to the back burner since the end of 2009, and I haven't been doing nearly as much with it as I should be. Time to change that. I'm not going to turn into a pushy salesperson, that's just not who I am. But I have to step up my game plan and really put a lot more effort behind this business if I want to reap the benefits that are available.
Those are some of my changes. What changes do you have waiting? What small steps can you take that could potentially have a big effect? I had been putting off those questions for a long time. Now, it's time to face them.
Cheers!
I am facing quite a number of changes right now. Some of them were brought on by my own choice, others were presented to me by someone else. Although I can't go into details for some of them, I'll share a few that I can.
Since my youngest was born in 2008, I have wanted to lose a little weight and tone up my stomach. I am not out to lose 100 pounds (even I know that would be really bad), and I most likely will not turn into a fitness fanatic overnight, but I do need to increase my physical activity, as well as my healthy food intake. I cannot afford, nor do I have the schedule, to join a gym. So I bought Wii Zumba. I had never done Zumba, and when I first tried it, I fell in love with it. One might say that I'm slightly addicted to it. Although I still don't exercise in any sort of regular intervals, once I start on Zumba, I could do it for hours. I've been trying to take advantage of some outdoor activities,too, like snowshoeing with my son's class or ice skating at the college Campus Center. As soon as the weather turns just a little nicer, I plan to take a short walk twice a day, at least two or three days a week, by parking on the opposite side of campus and walking into work. A gym routine I can't do. These kind of activities, I can, and I plan to make it more of a priority to move just a little more every day. I know these little changes will not result in having a super-toned body, but if it will help me feel better and get my muscles moving, then I'll do it.
As for eating better, I was presented with quite a huge challenge today. A friend of mine is starting a 40-day raw vegan diet, and she's invited others to join her. Whereas I've never even been a vegetarian for more than an hour or two, going completely raw vegan would be way too big a drastic change for my body to handle or for my mind to accept. For those who are interested, a raw vegan diet (from what I understand) consists only of raw fruit, veggies, sprouts, nuts, seeds, oils, and juices. No meat products, or foods cooked above 116 degrees Fahrenheit. I'm going to take this challenge and revise it a bit to better fit my budget, lifestyle and opportunity (with 3 kids in the house, buying food for 2 completely different meals every time we eat just doesn't make sense). For me, this challenge is going to mean simply much more raw fruits, veggies, nuts, sprouts, etc and much less sugar, processed food, junk food, and such. I'm going to force myself to choose grapes and a banana over cheese crackers and granola bars for a snack. Won't be easy, but I'm hoping that the benefits of eating healthier and doing more exercise will pay off in the end.
There are some job-related changes on the horizon, as well. I can't go into detail about this just yet, but I'm excited about the possibilities that these changes could open up. My responsibilities will be shifting and I should be able to do more of what I like to do, which is a very good thing. This also gives me the chance to improve some of my skills and use more creativity, also very good things.
I'm also brainstorming more than ever how to boost up my business and sales with Creative Memories. This side business, which I absolutely love, has been pushed to the back burner since the end of 2009, and I haven't been doing nearly as much with it as I should be. Time to change that. I'm not going to turn into a pushy salesperson, that's just not who I am. But I have to step up my game plan and really put a lot more effort behind this business if I want to reap the benefits that are available.
Those are some of my changes. What changes do you have waiting? What small steps can you take that could potentially have a big effect? I had been putting off those questions for a long time. Now, it's time to face them.
Cheers!
Lessons from the Birthday Peanut
Today, my baby turns 5. I won't bore you with the details of all the ways we celebrated her, but I want to dedicate this particular post to her and all the ways that she has affected my life, and my concept of AHA.
Lessons I Have Learned From My Daughter:
Happy birthday to my beautiful, awesome, amazing little Peanut. I very much look forward to many more moments of AHA with you.
Cheers!
Lessons I Have Learned From My Daughter:
- Always look your best. Throughout this entire winter, whenever she has had to take off her hat, she runs her hands down her long hair and whispers to me, "Is my hair messy?" At first I would sort of roll my eyes and think, "You're 4. You're not suppose to care what your hair looks like." But then I began to relish the fact that my young daughter wants to look good. I'm not out to raise another JonBenet Ramsey, and although the thought of beauty pageants had entered my mind very shortly after she was born, I no longer have any interest. I try to look my best, at least when I'm out in public, so why shouldn't she, even at 4 or 5 years old? It only takes a second to check yourself in the mirror, and brush your hair if needed. One is never too young (or old) to be beautiful.
- Any time is a good time to be fancy. My daughter is fascinated and obsessed with makeup and jewelry. I'm not quite sure how or why, because I don't wear a lot of either. But she is, and when asked what she would like to play on a day off, she usually answers with gusto, "Beauty shop!" She pulls out all of her various containers of makeup, nail files and polish, chapstick and lip glosses, and all the rings, necklaces, hairbands and bracelets she can find. Then we get fancy. She does my makeup and I do hers. She shares her jewelry with me, and asks to have some of mine. We each wear a combination of no less than 3 kinds of chapstick, lipstick, and/or lip gloss. She brushes my hair, I brush hers. She usually allows me to put her hair into braids, pigtails, or some other form of an "updo" as best I can. We load on the jewelry. This is good old-fashioned dress up play, and she loves this time with me, and I with her. And we usually do this on days when we have no plans to go anywhere. (Please let it be known that I emphasize to her again and again that she doesn't need any of these things to be beautiful. I enjoy our makeup sessions, but by no means do I think she needs it. I am doing my best to prevent her from growing up to be a high-maintenance make-up junkie!)
- Always dance when given the chance. This is her second year of organized dance classes, and even though I know she loves it, she doesn't always want to go. However, put some music on the stereo in our home living room and she'll go nuts. We can't have certain music playing while we eat dinner, because the kids will expend more effort dancing than they will eating. Any possible chance she is given to let loose and dance, she does. And she usually loves every moment of it. Dance whenever you're able, it's good for the soul.
- A lot can be learned in the kitchen. Of the 3 kids, she is the most willing to help out in the kitchen, with the exception of my youngest's obsession with emptying out the dishwasher. She's helped me make cookies, brownies, pancakes, bacon, deviled eggs, and assorted variations of chicken. I love having her help me cook, because it means I get to talk with her. I feel useful as a teacher. I'm comfortable cooking and enjoy helping her become that way, too. When it was on TV, I watched Jamie Oliver's Food Revolution with the kids and had them help me chop veggies for salads and such. She loved that! I am beginning to understand when people talk about the "connection" made with their mother or grandmother by helping them cook. And I'm hoping that one day, my daughter will look back and say, "My mom taught me how to do this, and I love it."
- Treasure the little things. She is a collector. She will randomly pick up a rock, a stone, a leaf or scrap of paper and insist on keeping it because it's pretty, or she drew it for me, or her friend gave it to her. And no matter how silly I find it, I can't convince her to throw it away. So I let her keep it. Sometimes, when she's not home, I go through her room and throw things away. Lately, I've found myself taking pause at certain things. Something that I told her to throw away, but she held it clenched in her little hands, pulled tight against her chest, begging me, "Pleeeeeease Mama, please can I keep it?" Those things I've found myself leaving alone. I still think it's silly to keep a rock or a leaf in her room, but if it has some sort of meaning to her, who am I to take that away? I have plenty of things that people might view as "silly" but I hold them dear. Even the smallest items can sometimes hold the biggest memories, and no one deserves to have those stripped away.
- Keep your guardian angels close. We have gone through periods of nighttime uncertainties, as most kids do. There was a time, for maybe a month or so, when she would cry and cry at bedtime, and not go to bed unless I let her sleep with me. I'm not sure how much the divorce has played into this, but she likes her security. She always has at least 5 or 6 stuffed animals in her bed with her to help "keep her safe." She needs a nightlight on. She likes having concrete things around to help comfort her. The latest scenario I've used to help her get to sleep is a story about a white wolf (good) and a black wolf (bad). They fight whenever we have a choice to make, and the one who wins the fight is the one you feed. So, if you "feed" the white wolf with good, happy, positive thoughts, it will make good, happy, positive things happen. In order to physically demonstrate this point, I took a statuette of a white wolf from her brother's room and put it on a shelf facing her bed. She named it Sally. Sally the White Wolf watches over her while she sleeps, and so long as she continues to feed Sally with positive thoughts, Sally will help keep all the bad, negative things out of her room. So far, this has worked fairly well, and my daughter will pet Sally, stroking her small, polyresin back. Then she gives Sally a quick kiss, says goodnight and crawls into bed with a smile on her face. Whatever guardian angels you may have, may they never be lost to the world of adulthood. Everyone needs to believe in something.
Happy birthday to my beautiful, awesome, amazing little Peanut. I very much look forward to many more moments of AHA with you.
Cheers!
What's the Purpose?
When I started this blog about 9 months ago, the sole purpose of it was to recognize the things in my life that I can accept, and be happy and appreciative about. In that time, my demeanor has changed dramatically from one of despair to one of contentment, and I have spent many hours crafting posts that highlight the various elements of awesomeness in my life. I'm definitely still a work in progress, and I doubt that I'll ever completely lose the AHA perspective, but I'm finding that it's becoming more difficult to write in the Moments of AHA mindset, and that some of my posts have just become labored ramblings of randomness.
So what's the purpose of a blog if it loses it's direction? Not much of anything, really. I've begun exploring different possibilities... possibilities of many, many aspects of my life. In all the retrospection and searching I've forced myself to do in the past 12 months, I've come to a few brick walls that I'm not quite sure how to get around. But I learned today that brick walls are there to allow us to prove how badly we want something. I guess I just have to decide what is on the other side of the wall and if I want to get to it that badly. Or if the brick wall is there to set me in a different direction.
So, my blog. Moments of AHA- Acceptance, Happiness and Appreciation. There's always some way to celebrate AHA, but in all seriousness how many more "I have the awesome-est friends on the planet" posts can my readers take? Unless I start naming names, and you're one of those names, I'm guessing that that particular kind of post is not going to hold people's attention. Nor does it help anyone. A subsequent purpose for this blog was to help inspire others and help them learn from my mistakes and life's lessons. I am not the end-all be-all of Life Coaches (far from it, although I'll admit the idea of Life Coaching has crossed my mind), but I truly believe that we can learn *something* from someone else's experiences, especially if we have similar experiences. So, I wanted to help people take whatever sadness they are faced with and be able to turn it around. We all have the ability to react positively to any given situation, however sometimes we just need a little nudge in the right direction.
Today was a nudge for me. Actually, I think it was more like a shove off the cliff. I was introduced, via YouTube, to Randy Pausch, a professor of computer science at Carnegie Mellon University. In September 2006, he was diagnosed with incurable pancreatic cancer and was given 3 to 6 months to live. In September 2007, as part of a Carnegie Mellon lecture series titled "The Last Lecture" he delivered a speech to a packed auditorium of 400 students and faculty which became an international phenomenon. Get your tissues if you watch it, and I highly recommend watching it. He died in July 2008 at 47. He was a regular guy, but he lived every aspect of his life having fun. He determined his dreams, and he lived them. He was a one-time extra in a Star Trek movie, he worked with Disney's Imagineering department, he pioneered Virtual Reality research at CMU, he experienced zero gravity. He was, and is, an inspiration and he is my new hero.
I've heard or read again and again that if you don't like something about your life, change it. Sometimes that's an easy thing to do. Sometimes it's very difficult. And more often than not, the outcome of that change will greatly affect others in your life. The wheels of motion cannot begin without a nudge. As much as I've discovered about myself, there still remain things that I am unhappy with. I'm exploring new avenues and ideas that will allow me to change those things. But this has proven quite difficult because I know many others in my life would be affected, some in good ways, some in not so good ways. I've struggled with finding what it is I really want to be and what I want to do with my life. I was not one of those kids who had specific childhood dreams, at least not that I remember. Randy Pausch targeted his childhood dreams and made them reality. I suppose it would be just as effective to target my mid-life (or quarter-life if I'm really optimistic) dreams and work toward making them real.
So, full circle- where does this leave my blog? I love writing and have been told I'm pretty good at it. I love making others laugh and have been told I'm pretty good at that too. I love being positive and I really enjoy sharing that outlook with others and helping them through whatever it is they're going through. I've been told I'm pretty good at that, too, which is both very humbling and motivational. If you've enjoyed reading some of the things I've written, please share with your friends. It's great to get feedback from people, and the biggest compliment I could get is meeting new people or having new followers thanks to a suggestion from a friend. Now that I'm a bit more stable than I was 9 to 12 months ago, there is some revamping that needs to be done. This is not the end of Moments of AHA. Any and all support I've gotten and get in the future is greatly, greatly appreciated. I'm not out to win a Nobel Peace Prize, but I need to take some more aggressive steps forward in my life. Bear with me, and don't be afraid to let me know how you think I'm doing. As always, thank you.
With much appreciation and love, Cheers!
So what's the purpose of a blog if it loses it's direction? Not much of anything, really. I've begun exploring different possibilities... possibilities of many, many aspects of my life. In all the retrospection and searching I've forced myself to do in the past 12 months, I've come to a few brick walls that I'm not quite sure how to get around. But I learned today that brick walls are there to allow us to prove how badly we want something. I guess I just have to decide what is on the other side of the wall and if I want to get to it that badly. Or if the brick wall is there to set me in a different direction.
So, my blog. Moments of AHA- Acceptance, Happiness and Appreciation. There's always some way to celebrate AHA, but in all seriousness how many more "I have the awesome-est friends on the planet" posts can my readers take? Unless I start naming names, and you're one of those names, I'm guessing that that particular kind of post is not going to hold people's attention. Nor does it help anyone. A subsequent purpose for this blog was to help inspire others and help them learn from my mistakes and life's lessons. I am not the end-all be-all of Life Coaches (far from it, although I'll admit the idea of Life Coaching has crossed my mind), but I truly believe that we can learn *something* from someone else's experiences, especially if we have similar experiences. So, I wanted to help people take whatever sadness they are faced with and be able to turn it around. We all have the ability to react positively to any given situation, however sometimes we just need a little nudge in the right direction.
Today was a nudge for me. Actually, I think it was more like a shove off the cliff. I was introduced, via YouTube, to Randy Pausch, a professor of computer science at Carnegie Mellon University. In September 2006, he was diagnosed with incurable pancreatic cancer and was given 3 to 6 months to live. In September 2007, as part of a Carnegie Mellon lecture series titled "The Last Lecture" he delivered a speech to a packed auditorium of 400 students and faculty which became an international phenomenon. Get your tissues if you watch it, and I highly recommend watching it. He died in July 2008 at 47. He was a regular guy, but he lived every aspect of his life having fun. He determined his dreams, and he lived them. He was a one-time extra in a Star Trek movie, he worked with Disney's Imagineering department, he pioneered Virtual Reality research at CMU, he experienced zero gravity. He was, and is, an inspiration and he is my new hero.
I've heard or read again and again that if you don't like something about your life, change it. Sometimes that's an easy thing to do. Sometimes it's very difficult. And more often than not, the outcome of that change will greatly affect others in your life. The wheels of motion cannot begin without a nudge. As much as I've discovered about myself, there still remain things that I am unhappy with. I'm exploring new avenues and ideas that will allow me to change those things. But this has proven quite difficult because I know many others in my life would be affected, some in good ways, some in not so good ways. I've struggled with finding what it is I really want to be and what I want to do with my life. I was not one of those kids who had specific childhood dreams, at least not that I remember. Randy Pausch targeted his childhood dreams and made them reality. I suppose it would be just as effective to target my mid-life (or quarter-life if I'm really optimistic) dreams and work toward making them real.
So, full circle- where does this leave my blog? I love writing and have been told I'm pretty good at it. I love making others laugh and have been told I'm pretty good at that too. I love being positive and I really enjoy sharing that outlook with others and helping them through whatever it is they're going through. I've been told I'm pretty good at that, too, which is both very humbling and motivational. If you've enjoyed reading some of the things I've written, please share with your friends. It's great to get feedback from people, and the biggest compliment I could get is meeting new people or having new followers thanks to a suggestion from a friend. Now that I'm a bit more stable than I was 9 to 12 months ago, there is some revamping that needs to be done. This is not the end of Moments of AHA. Any and all support I've gotten and get in the future is greatly, greatly appreciated. I'm not out to win a Nobel Peace Prize, but I need to take some more aggressive steps forward in my life. Bear with me, and don't be afraid to let me know how you think I'm doing. As always, thank you.
With much appreciation and love, Cheers!
Tropical Twist
I am really sick of the snow. Have I mentioned that? I decided to do something a little different to try to shake the winter blues. It was actually an idea that I got from a coworker - Tropical Party! Pull all the shades, crank up the heat, decorate with cheap party lights and drink margaritas and daquiris. Sounds like a plan to me!
Today ended up being much busier than I had anticipated. Before I tell you that story, I need to tell you this one...
Yesterday the kids and I hung around the house and didn't do a whole lot. But I knew I needed to go to the store eventually because we had a birthday party to attend in the morning. As I was cleaning off the car later on yesterday afternoon, a small beagle came prancing down the middle of the street. I thought this to be a bit odd, since it was really cold, and very quiet throughout the neighborhood. I called to him and he came right over to me. He was very friendly. I called the local police department to see if they could help me out- late afternoon on a Friday and a lost dog wanders into my life. Fabulous. I brought the dog inside (which he seemed very happy about), and that of course thrilled the kids. My daughter told me, "He's cute. I like him. I want him to live here." Tough patooties, sweetheart!! I happen to be enjoying my dog-free house. And this dog was definitely not a stray. He was much too good looking. He had a family somewhere, and I was going to find them. Well, this of course put a damper on going to the store, because I wasn't about to leave a strange dog alone in the house for any amount of time. So he hung out with us for a few hours. My youngest son informed me that his name was Luigi. "Oh really," I said. "You named the dog Luigi?" "Yeah," he said, with a hint of "duh, Mommy" in his voice. "Luigi the dog." "Fine, we'll call him Luigi, but we ARE NOT KEEPING THIS DOG!" I was sure to make it quite clear that this was a temporary arrangement. Long story short... I put a photo of Luigi on Facebook, and I'm not sure if the owner saw the photo or called the police department first, but either way... the dog's real name is Charlie and his owner found us. I was very happy, the kids were very sad, and offered to play with or walk Charlie anytime. And they still call him Luigi.
Which bring us back to Saturday... since I didn't go to the store on Friday, I had to get up and do it first thing on Saturday. My oldest son had basketball, so the 2 younger ones and I ran to the store and managed to find a suitable gift in a very short period of time, then headed down the road to McDonald's for the birthday party. The party was a smash hit, and all the kids there had a blast. Going home was not high on the priority list of my children when I said that it was time to pack up. Youngest needed a nap. I needed to get some groceries for the get together being held at my house, starting in approximately 3 hours. The grocery store could have been a lot worse, and I attempted to get the little man to nap for a bit (attempted, being the operative word- it didn't happen) while I finished getting things ready for the party. When the first guests arrived, any hopes of napping flew right out the front door. But, as it turned out, that was ok.
All in all, about 20 or so people showed up and crowded themselves in my very small dining room and kitchen. On the menu was crockpot mac and cheese, BBQ ribs (which I grilled outside on the grill, and burned), hot dogs, lots of fruit and fruit dip, and an assortment of chips and cookies, an assortment of wine and beer, and strawberry daquiris. A few of the guests wore appropriate tropical clothing (me, not being one of them, as I was too busy to change). The kids had colored sunshines and palm trees on construction paper and hung their pictures throughout the dining and living rooms. We weren't sweating, but I did turn the heat up. The highlight of the whole she-bang was bringing the turtle sandbox up from the basement, putting it in the kitchen and filling it with snow for the little kids to play in! They had an absolute blast! And almost every adult commented on what a great idea it was. I tried to say hi to everyone, but was busy running around, which is, ironically, how I like hosting, I think. All 7 kids who were there were very well behaved. The adults all seemed to have a great time chatting and meeting new people. I think I had one interaction that would have been considered a decent conversation, but I had a great time. It makes me so happy to see others having fun thanks to efforts that I have put forth. And what a great way to turn winter on it's ear! That is definitely going on my list of party themes to do again!
Overall, a great day, and lots of opportunities to find AHA.
Cheers!
Today ended up being much busier than I had anticipated. Before I tell you that story, I need to tell you this one...
Yesterday the kids and I hung around the house and didn't do a whole lot. But I knew I needed to go to the store eventually because we had a birthday party to attend in the morning. As I was cleaning off the car later on yesterday afternoon, a small beagle came prancing down the middle of the street. I thought this to be a bit odd, since it was really cold, and very quiet throughout the neighborhood. I called to him and he came right over to me. He was very friendly. I called the local police department to see if they could help me out- late afternoon on a Friday and a lost dog wanders into my life. Fabulous. I brought the dog inside (which he seemed very happy about), and that of course thrilled the kids. My daughter told me, "He's cute. I like him. I want him to live here." Tough patooties, sweetheart!! I happen to be enjoying my dog-free house. And this dog was definitely not a stray. He was much too good looking. He had a family somewhere, and I was going to find them. Well, this of course put a damper on going to the store, because I wasn't about to leave a strange dog alone in the house for any amount of time. So he hung out with us for a few hours. My youngest son informed me that his name was Luigi. "Oh really," I said. "You named the dog Luigi?" "Yeah," he said, with a hint of "duh, Mommy" in his voice. "Luigi the dog." "Fine, we'll call him Luigi, but we ARE NOT KEEPING THIS DOG!" I was sure to make it quite clear that this was a temporary arrangement. Long story short... I put a photo of Luigi on Facebook, and I'm not sure if the owner saw the photo or called the police department first, but either way... the dog's real name is Charlie and his owner found us. I was very happy, the kids were very sad, and offered to play with or walk Charlie anytime. And they still call him Luigi.
Which bring us back to Saturday... since I didn't go to the store on Friday, I had to get up and do it first thing on Saturday. My oldest son had basketball, so the 2 younger ones and I ran to the store and managed to find a suitable gift in a very short period of time, then headed down the road to McDonald's for the birthday party. The party was a smash hit, and all the kids there had a blast. Going home was not high on the priority list of my children when I said that it was time to pack up. Youngest needed a nap. I needed to get some groceries for the get together being held at my house, starting in approximately 3 hours. The grocery store could have been a lot worse, and I attempted to get the little man to nap for a bit (attempted, being the operative word- it didn't happen) while I finished getting things ready for the party. When the first guests arrived, any hopes of napping flew right out the front door. But, as it turned out, that was ok.
All in all, about 20 or so people showed up and crowded themselves in my very small dining room and kitchen. On the menu was crockpot mac and cheese, BBQ ribs (which I grilled outside on the grill, and burned), hot dogs, lots of fruit and fruit dip, and an assortment of chips and cookies, an assortment of wine and beer, and strawberry daquiris. A few of the guests wore appropriate tropical clothing (me, not being one of them, as I was too busy to change). The kids had colored sunshines and palm trees on construction paper and hung their pictures throughout the dining and living rooms. We weren't sweating, but I did turn the heat up. The highlight of the whole she-bang was bringing the turtle sandbox up from the basement, putting it in the kitchen and filling it with snow for the little kids to play in! They had an absolute blast! And almost every adult commented on what a great idea it was. I tried to say hi to everyone, but was busy running around, which is, ironically, how I like hosting, I think. All 7 kids who were there were very well behaved. The adults all seemed to have a great time chatting and meeting new people. I think I had one interaction that would have been considered a decent conversation, but I had a great time. It makes me so happy to see others having fun thanks to efforts that I have put forth. And what a great way to turn winter on it's ear! That is definitely going on my list of party themes to do again!
Overall, a great day, and lots of opportunities to find AHA.
Cheers!
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