I've realized lately that many of my status updates on Facebook have referenced what it is I'm looking forward to. It's true, that I tend to get excited about things yet to come, but I also wanted to make sure that I, and all of you, understand that appreciating the here and now is also a very wise thing to do.
A number of years ago, on occasion (ok, more like whenever I could), I would watch the Disney animated series called The Weekenders. The basic premise is that we get to follow the misadventures of 4 seventh grade friends - Tish, Lor, Carver and Tino - as they make the most of their precious weekends. Tino narrated the show, and at the end of every episode there was some moral they all learned, and he would sign off with the phrase, "Later days!" My ex and I got into the habit of saying that as we parted ways with friends. Somewhere along the way, it was pointed out to us that "later days are nice, but seeing you soon is good too." I think after that, I stopped saying it.
There is definitely something to be said for looking forward to the future. If we didn't look forward to anything, we wouldn't be able to make goals, set standards, get motivated or give ourselves a reason to just keep going. At the same time, I think that if we concentrate too hard on what's to come, we are liable to miss out on incredible opportunities right here, right now. Once again, life is a fine balancing act between two lines that seem nearly impossible to mix... how to fully appreciate the Now while still eagerly anticipating the Future. And we can't forget about the Past, either. That has merit, so long as we learn from it but don't dwell in it.
Our past is our foundation. The basis of how we learn and build the rest of our life. That's not to say that we should live our life in the exact same manner as how things have been done previously. Not at all. We assess, we evaluate, we learn, we adjust. If something worked well for us in the past, chances are we'll try it again. If something didn't go the way we wanted it to, we'll probably take a slightly different approach. We cannot change things once they've taken place, however we are constantly looking back to see what the end result was and if or how we should do things differently next time. So long as we learn, there is never a bad experience.
Living in the present day allows us to grow, appreciate and love. It was said to me an infinite number of times when my kids were born: "Treasure every moment, they grow up too fast." And I'll be damned if that's not one of the truest statements in the history of forever. I absolutely can't worry about what college will cost, or what they'll be when they grow up, or if he's still mad because I made him take a bath yesterday... Time is precious. And if I can't see, appreciate and love every moment of every day with my kids, I will miss it forever. Same goes for adult friends and relationships. True, we aren't as cute as most kids, and we certainly don't change quite as much, but we should still treasure every gathering, every conversation, every kiss, every moment spent with good friends. Because these moments directly in front of us help determine our future, and help us choose who we are going to be as a person.
The Future, of course, is somewhat based on how we've lived our lives in the Past and in the Now. We can turn into old curmudgeons who don't give a crap about much of anything and yell at the damn kids on our lawn. Or we can offer those kids a drink on a warm day. We can call the cops on the dog two doors down who won't stop barking, or we can smile at our neighbor, even if we think that she owns the most annoying dog on the planet. We don't know what will happen in our future, but we can prepare ourselves for whatever possibilities await by having a good attitude and outlook on life. That makes looking forward pleasant. Appreciating, anticipating, loving the unknown makes the unknown easier to handle once we get there.
So, while I may comment frequently on things that I am excitedly awaiting, at the same time I'm greatly appreciative of what I have right in front of me, right now, as well as what I've already left behind. My life has certainly not turned out the way that I expected it would, but I have nothing to complain about and lots to look forward to. Here's hoping that we may all be able to learn from our past, appreciate our present and enjoy our future!
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